God Bless America

Lindsay Lohan taped an interview on The Tonight Show with Jay Leno, last night, that will air tonight. Kristen Chenoweth and her fivehead were bumped as a result of this interview being last minute. Ratings are ratings, nothing wrong there. EW is reporting though that Lohan received a standing ovation…

The f*ck? Only in the United States and ONLY at The Jay Leno Show would Lindsay f*cking Lohan receive a standing ovation. Lindsay Lohan went on there to clear her name, for the most part, but to also confirm her role in the Gotti movie, a desperate attempt to reinstate in the minds of middle America that she is still, first and foremost a felon, a drunk, a drug addict, a loser an actress. So she was rewarded with a standing ovation? What exactly has she DONE that getting off of your fat ass in the audience to applaud her seemed like a good idea? This is why I hate people…

Lindsay Lohan hasn’t acted in around 5 years. She did a TV movie for ABC, and that was her last piece of work. She can still get cut out of this Gotti piece of sh*t so her running around, talking about this role is  bad karma. What bothers me the most is that she chose Leno, or rather Leno chose her. If you think they just randomly chose his show you are misguided. Leno does not ask tough questions. Leno does pre-interviews for ALMOST everyone. Leno plays softball, and everyone knows this. When was the last time you saw a GREAT Leno interview pop up on the news, or a blog? Like one where he really asked that question? Exactly. Matt, Letterman, Handler, Oprah (who would never book her), Fergeson, all those guys and maybe even Ellen would be like WHAT THE F*CK IS WRONG WITH YOUR STUPID ASS?! But this was safe, this was strategic, this was the safest choice and probably the only choice that would book her on the show.

I want Lindsay Lohan to succeed, I do. I want her to get her sh*t together. But she’s done this exact same interview before. And that was 4 years ago and where are we now? So don’t tell me to sympathize with her because I won’t because she’s not focused, she doesn’t care, she’ll be in a club in a month. She’ll be getting arrested again. You want to fix your career? Get out of L.A where no one cares about your health or mental state, stop partying at the Chateau Mormont until 4 am, stop trying to work and focus on getting yourself together before anything, put your head down and do your court services and shut the f*ck up and stop asking for sympathy. Tina Fey needs to be her mother, because this shit would not have happened or continued to happen.

Here’s her clearing up the rumors before:

One more time:

One more time:

They say that the age you become famous, is the age you are mentally at for forever. For the most part, the equation works well enough. So Lindsay will forever be a little girl. Whatever. She can go on Leno, she can go to do the Gotti movie but thanks God for this judge because as a result of her stealing a necklace, Lohan will have to serve her community service… at a morgue. Ah, there’s the balance.

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